Now, the “I’m unhappy, I need a break” are words coming from my own mouth. We love a déjà vu, hypocritical moment. It feels almost unfair that I am saying this—I have fought for this relationship, loved deeply in this relationship, yet why is this unhappily happy feeling returning.
I had to let you go because you don’t need me anymore. Things are starting to change. You’re leaving. The physical distance is even more strain. You’ll be gone for too long. How long can I really wait? These decisions would be too much you and not enough of me. Loving you has been the greatest, most beautiful story I have. Every night that flood in my apartment from July of 2017 returns; I cannot help myself. Maybe I am this anchor that continues to drown us both into what ideally could be, but realistically is almost impossible. I struggle with the decision I made, but I am not sure what else I can do. My world is just so dull without you.Read More